Ready... Set... Go...

Wow, four months have gone by since I posted something. I have been writing. Just not posting. Many changes, new things and thoughts have been going on in this "busy" brain of mine. I feel as if I have been living in a small whirl wind of emotions. Some days feeling very happy and content then frustrated and beyond overwhelmed.

Happy and content....blessed and loved. In ways I have longed for. It's truly is the little things that make all the difference in the day to day.

My Motto for the current moment is: "One Thing At A Time".

Which I say Laughingly at times...because it seems as if the is one of my Life Motto's. The Stress that one can carry is Incredible concerning all that may be happening. I have had to learn how to compartmentalize many of my emotions to just get through the Crap of Life. I think it is funny how people can say "your so emotional" and "I just don't know how they will react". Well... if you never give them the opportunity to react. I guess you are more afraid of your emotions... then the other person is of theirs.

I hear so often people say they "don't want to deal with Drama". Well...It is there even if you don't want to deal with it. People have scrects that don't want to be told or found out. But, eventually they will come out. I know we all have a certain part of us that wishes we never said those words or made that choice.

Drama is Defined as:

dra·ma                                                                                                                      

noun

1.

a composition in prose or verse presenting in dialogue or pantomime a story involving conflict or contrast of character, especially one intended to be acted on the stage; a play.

2.

the branch of literature having such compositions as its subject; dramatic art or representation.

3.

the art dealing with the writing and production of plays.

4.

any situation or series of events having vivid, emotional, conflicting, or striking interest or results: the drama of a murder trial.

5.

the quality of being dramatic.

Therefore, I believe we all have Drama in our lives and how we chose to respond to it shows a person's true character.

My Friend Closet.

I have a wonderful group of amazing friends. I am beyond blessed to have the closet of friends I have. We all have Friends who water our souls and push us in ways we can not ourselves. We also have friends that we just want to have fun with without any judgements.

My favorite thing about my friend closet is the amount of respect I have for my Friends and what each of them has taught me about myself. A select few of them have sat and cried with me when that was all I could do. My words could never express my gratitude. Some I have laughed so hard with...I thought I was going to have abs of steel forever...haha!!!

I believe God places people in your life for a specific purpose and some are there forever, some for a short time, and some go in and out. Real friends no matter time or distances are always friends. You know a friend for life when you just pick up right where you left off.

I am thankful, blessed, and love My Friends each and everyone!!! You Have all helped shape me and been there for me!!

Feeling Stuck

Anyone Else....Feel this way at times??

I think in my life I feel stuck when I have big DECISIONS to make that are going to impact those closest to me. I try to always take in to account how my decisions will affect them..even before me. I never want to hurt someone or cause pain. Sometimes, pain is impossible to avoid. I know there are people in my Life that do not think how there decisions affect those of us around them. I know we all are responsible for our reactions to a person/or situation. I just get very frustrated when I know that they think of only themselves...even when they say they do consider how what they do affects those around them. I do my best to always think of the people in my life that will be affected most.

Feeling stuck in an impossible situation makes it very hard to see things clearly. sometimes our perception is just that. When we take a step back and look at the big picture our eyes are usually do open to the possibility of the change that can be made.

It may be a letter, phone call, or a conversation. You have been putting off. The outcome may surprise you. We all have to put ourselves about in someone today eldest shoes once in awhile. When we are able to step back, we can see we are not stuck.

We just need to have the faith to take a step forward to become unstuck.

Moving through the Pain.

As the years go by the sting and the scars are less and less...but they Never completely go away. Certain dates always trigger emotions/feelings. The date of: a wedding, birth of a child, a family member/loved passes away, a divorce or an anniversary of a specific event.

Sometimes, I am not thinking directly about that event on the day.
But during that day....I will hear a song, talk to a friend or come a cross something that will trigger an emotion/feeling. In that moment it will take me right back to those memories. We all have events/moments in our lives that cause us pain. There are ways to hide the pain for a while...but it eventually finds its way out. When the pain comes out it can show up when we least expect it. It is how we choose to deal with our emotions/feelings is what is important.

Having loved ones to confide in and share makes the sting bearable.
I am thankful for the Pain in My Life. I know there is a reason for it all. I have a purpose for going through in it all. Looking forward to the day when it all comes together. As for now, I will continue to write.

clouds don't last

Clouds don't last they bring rain when we need it most.

They bring shade on a hot day. The storm they accompany may be just what we need to make a change. A change that may not have been able to happen without it/them. Pain is a part of the clouds and storm. Without them we may stay in a place we are not suppose to. It forces us to see things about ourselves. We might not have seen.

They teach us what we need to change or what we need to watch for and not repeat. I believe pain can be twofold a catalyst for change/of a force to stop you dead in your path. Those of us who choose it as a catalyst...do move foward. Sometimes, not as fast as we would like...but we are still moving and changing. Those who let pain stop them...never evolve. They stop themselves from allowing the change that they may need most in their life.

For me personally I have done both. The times I have allowed it to stop me are the times I needed it most to change. Now, I have allowed it it to show me what I need to do to make the changes. Although, being completely honest it is not easy to see your faults sitting at your feet. What is most important for is that you recognize what needs to change. In doing that you are half way to where you need to be. In all of this, our strength grows stronger as we make the changes to become who we are to be. On the FLIPSIDE you must remember that our strengths far out way our faults . As long as we don't allow the pain to stop us on our path.

Kel<3

There are always consequences for each of our actions/choices...good and bad.

My thoughts are we all have free will to make good/bad choices/actions in our lives.

So...the question is who do you think of when your making them. Do you only think of yourself? Because each choice/action affects not only you/me...but those who are closest to us. This may be a difficult subject for some more than others. I have always been an observer of people around me..even at a young age. Therefore, I think I know quite a bit about the affect the choices/actions have on those that are closest to me.

The first circumstance that comes to mind is having to walk away from a relationship with a dear friend in High School. We spent almost every waking hour together. We were more like sisters. I loved her family. Just like they were my family. But...she was making choices that were affecting us both. I loved her very much and still to this day think of her often.

I had a wonderful ! Mentor in my life that pointed out what was happening. She was someone I trusted and knew she only wanted the "BEST" for me. She sat me down and said..."you see what is going on, right." I did...but didn't want to lose a friend.

Sometimes, we have to lose to gain.
Remember, all your choices affect others!
❤Kel

When I grow up.....or it seems the Journey is on going.

Growing up is a part of life..but I think for some it is a life long process. Each of us has our own specific Journey. I know I do. I know we have to take the good with the bad. We are all responsible for our choices and the consequences that come with them. I am thankful for the place I am at... and the future ahead. I have been thinking about all of this for awhile. So I thought I'd put it out there.

This was from a status I posted in March or April:

Ok....friends...Poll time. I am working on making some changes in life...As well as working on my BLOG....2 questions I have (please be honest)..:)....
1. What should I be when I grow up?__________
2. When I think of Kel Bird the one word that comes to mind is____________. Thanks for playing.

These are the answers that were given to the two questions:

A dancer and a very sweet person.
A therapist or Teacher/Honest
Therapist/kind
You should be a missionary ....or a social worker...caring :)
Teacher/Loving ♥
Teacher of therapists/ Supercalifragilisticexpialadocious :D love you!!
who needs to grow up/spunky
A crisis councilor/ loyal
princess... sexkitten (its totally one word)


I think it is funny to read what certain people think one word describes you. Some can use one word and others give an explanation. I love my Friends dearly and to see what they say makes me smile.

I think we are all on a journey of some kind. For some it may be spiritual, understanding themselves and finding their purpose in life. I know there may be many that have another reason for their journey.
We are all at different points on our journeys. Hopefully you are at peace with where you are. I know for me there are times I am. Then there are many times I am not and know something needs to change.

Hope this makes you think about your Journey.
Kel<3